Older Women Are Sharing The “Normal” Things Younger Women Do Today That Puzzle Them
You know — it has been pointed out many times but it is the nature of generation to leave the droppings of an achingly alien culture behind for the next to gobble up with mindless glee, but hearing that perspective can be a great opportunity to sit back and assess what has become normalized that is more than a little bit of not “normal.” Because you know, wisdom comes with you, and it helps to remind us that yes, we don′t necessarily have to keep up with the Kardashians.
So when u/IslamicAnime asked, “Older women of Reddit, what is something young women are doing that puzzles you?” I was surprised to find there were quite a few ‘hot takes’ I also agreed with. Here are some of the most relatable answers:
1. “[Buccal fat removal surgery] It’s permanent, and your body will never make more of it. Buccal fat removal ages the face immediately, which isn’t a problem for most women in their 20s, but as they actually do age, there is a high likelihood that they will need to constantly get fillers for the rest of their lives to combat the side effects of significant premature aging.”
2. “Blasting pictures of their young children all over social media with 1000 followers.”
“This! Especially photos of them in the bath and stuff, which is really not a good idea at all! I’d be horrified if my mum had done that back in the day. It’s bad enough she has real photos of me in the bath in a photo album but at least the world hasn’t seen them. I so agree with you.”
—u/[deleted]
3. “Crying on the internet. I’m talking full-on snot bubble crying. Maybe it’s my childhood trauma talking, but I can’t fathom having an awful thing happen to me and then whipping out my phone to tell my ‘followers’ about it. Maybe it’s because I have no followers. I just bury it deep and slap on a smile like my mom taught me.”
4. “Van life. The whole ‘Van life is so glamorous, look at me sipping my coffee sitting in the back of my van in front of the sunrise’ thing is WAY overrated and very, very fake. Van life or camper life can be fun and an adventure at times, yes – but it comes with a LOT of work, expense, and risk that people don’t tell you about.”
5. “I am bewildered by women who do not prioritize the ability to support themselves.”
“And understand finances. I do volunteer taxes and get so many women, even younger ones, who take no responsibility for understanding budgets, saving, credit, retirement, taxes, etc. Many of them are leading sad lives right on the edge and working in their 60s at horrible minimum-wage jobs.”
6. “Well done makeup, including contouring. I am an old hag and NEVER mastered the art, and now it seems like everyone can do it, and no matter what, I still look like a rodeo clown if I try. Young women who are into it seem to watch a couple of videos and become total artists. Beginner tutorial: find the right shade… Aaaaand I’m done.”
7. “Wearing comfy shoes (like sneakers) to the club… I’m not mad at it, I’m mad my dumbass never did that lol.”
8. “Accepting the bare minimum from dating. I see so many young women who are dating/catering to/’talking to’/ moving in with men who don’t seem at all interested in them. I can’t tell if it’s a legit shift in expectations and dating, or if I’m just middle-aged.”
9. “The overdone lip injections. I can’t wait for this trend to die.”
10. “Not using barrier birth control.”
“THIS ALWAYS gets me when it comes to Reddit comments! The number of people who nonchalantly brush off non-barrier sex like it is nothing, or like the pull method is a legit way to prevent STD transmission, boggles my mind.”
11. “Putting up with bullshit you know isn’t ok. We all do this, but as 40-somethings it’s painful to watch young women continue to stay in abusive or even just frustratingly imbalanced relationships. Realize your worth ladies… sooner, rather than later.”
“I once had a twenty-something woman tell me it was better to be in a bad marriage than single. I wanted to cry FOR her. Honey, no it is NOT! Life becomes really, really long when you’re married to someone you hate. Especially once any children y’all had are grown and gone.”
12. “Taking pictures of yourself all the time. Even as a younger person I can’t imagine doing this.”
13. “Not limited to women, but: gender reveal parties. I already have to go to your baby shower, and now you want me to go to another party? Do I have to bring a gift?”
14. “Having children with men who are basically children themselves. If you’re living with a guy and he doesn’t do a genuine 50% of the housework, it will be exponentially worse when you have a baby.”
15. “Botox in their early 20s. There’s nothing there. What wrinkles are you trying to fix?”
16. “Passive-aggressive roommate fights. DUDE. TALK TO PEOPLE. TALK. TO. PEOPLE. This is the perfect time in your life to be practicing assertiveness and healthy conflict resolution. All this shitty note-writing and vague group text chatting and bullshit is making whatever the problem is a thousand times worse.”
17. “I know a few 17-18-year-old girls who have decided not to learn to drive or get licensed because their boyfriends always have cars; not to finish school because they don’t enjoy it; and don’t ever want to vote because that stuff’s boring. They have these precious rights to be free, to be educated, to be heard, and they don’t care!”
18. “Young women talking about the ‘divine feminine’ and being with a man who has a lot of masculine energy so you can ‘relax into your feminine energy.’ This sounds like a new-age way to talk about regressive gender stereotypes and roles to me. I want to tell them they should just try to find someone who makes them feel happy and comfortable with who they are, as they are right now. Being happy and relaxed doesn’t make you more feminine or masculine, in my opinion.”
19. “Letting everyone on the internet know exactly where you are at all times and what your schedule is seems a bit nuts.”
20. “The way young women seem to worry so much about their genitals’ appearance. To the point of surgery on their labia and bleaching their anus. I blame porn, I suppose, but I hate that these young women feel so judged that they need to resort to this.”
21. “The performative nature of everything. Ask someone to a dance? They have signs and cameras filming and gifts…. they film everything. It’s insane. There’s no concept of privacy or events being just for them and their loved ones. It’s like it’s all a movie or play put on for the world to see 100% of the time. They don’t seem to live their lives for themselves but for followers. It’s really sad.”
22. “Big, fluffy false eyelashes. I tried it once and it felt like caterpillars on my eyelids, they had to come off right away. I don’t know how they stand it, but I admire their skill. (Just wanna make it clear here, I’m not about shitting on the aesthetics of young people. You do you, my sweet children! It’s just not for me.)”
“My generation laughed at Tammy Faye Baker’s eyelashes. This generation aspires to them. It boggles me.”
—u/my_monkeys_fly
23. And finally, “Why the need for five parties, two wedding dresses, B and C lists, and numerous other demands… just to get married? Just get married. It’s not that complicated. Save the money (and more importantly, the money of your guests and bridal party) for something that will actually mean something – charity, home down payment, personal enrichment in classes or travel… whatever, the sky is the limit. Spare yourself the time and stress of going overboard to follow the new cultural norms.”
