‘AITA for waiting until after my GF had her baby to tell her that I’m sterile?’

So, I (35M) dated my girlfriend (32F) for almost four years and we never had any issues other than the fact that we both were completely aware and agreed that neither of us wanted to have children (which was not a problem for either of us). So when she told him that she was two months pregnant, he was caught off guard, but really he had no right to be because he is 100% sterile. OP held his rage at bay briefly but figured out that OP had been wronged. Rather than confronting her head on, he went along with things until the baby was born. Two weeks later, the day she came in to deliver, he said he knew the child wasn’t his and was leaving her right away. He has received backlash from her family and mutual friends ever since, who claim he did so without regard.

At its core, this situation revolves around deception, reproductive coercion, and OP’s dramatic approach to confrontation. His ex-girlfriend’s actions constitute a severe breach of trust—one that could be considered both emotionally and ethically wrong. Paternity fraud, while not criminal in most places, can have legal and financial consequences, especially if the accused father unknowingly assumes parental responsibility. Courts in various jurisdictions have, in some cases, allowed men to seek damages for emotional distress or fraud when paternity deception is proven.

From OP’s perspective, he was left with few good options. If he had confronted her earlier, she might have attempted to manipulate the situation or even tried to pin responsibility on him. His decision to wait until after the birth was a strategic move, ensuring he had undeniable proof before walking away. However, the manner in which he chose to leave—dropping the revelation at the hospital immediately after childbirth—was a calculated and brutal move. While it was a moment of justified catharsis for OP, it also left his ex vulnerable at one of the most physically and emotionally exhausting times of her life.

The backlash from mutual friends and family likely stems not from his choice to leave but from how he did it. Many might feel he should have confronted her sooner or handled the breakup in a less dramatic way. That said, betrayal cuts deep, and it’s understandable why OP felt the need to deliver his final words with impact.

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Judgement: NTA for leaving, but damn what a brutal way to go about it. After your ex duped you with one of the crudest tricks imaginable, your own take on abandoning her—literally, as soon as she birthed a child—was a nuclear option. It was the correct rooted thing to do in an ethical sense, but the social timing and execution was dan savage cruel.